Friday, July 4, 2008

Celebrities that Probably Smell

In this segment we propose that celebrities stink... and how.

The look that launched a thousand Hepa filters.

Wow. You feel that in your nose? The change in sinus pressure like the bow wake before a thunderstorm? That tinny taste in your throat?

Gotcha. You aren’t sucking on a Luden’s watch battery, you are thinking about Jonathan Pryce.

You know it. He knows it. So let’s just stop the pretending and get really real:

A steaming mug of Pepto Bismol. A suprised skunk. A prostitutes pillow case in July.

It is impossible to believe that isn’t what our esteemed actor, who is known for playing slight, effete, quirky, scary and always off-center roles both on and off the stage must smell like.
If you don't believe me then attend the local role playing game convention, stand in the men's room and say "Pryce" out loud. You will receive (unwashed) high fives from heavily costumed wizards, orcs, warriors, theives and C++ programmers who defer to their inspiration in persperation.

No better time than the 4th of July to declare our independence of effervescence by fanning the face of freedom due to a British aromatic actor, a Celebrity… That Probably Smells.

See the armed guy next to Pryce? With the pinched face? He isn't acting... he's that close.

3 comments:

Maus said...

i bet johnny depp wouldn't smell, right? right?

of course not.

kotzen said...

well of course not, sister. he's too pretty to smell.

GOD.

Amy said...

I might have known you two were involved in this plot.