Wednesday, April 4, 2007

Celebrities that Probably Smell

In this segment we propose that celebrities stink... and how.

Papa... can you... smell me?

It’s double coupon day here at CTPS and I already opened a window. I give you Kris Kristofferson and Barbara Streisand.

At all points of his life Kris struck me as someone I imagined I can smell right off the movie screen. Not a horrible actor or singer but he strikes me as the kind of guy that usually smells like a collosion of wet loose-leaf, home-rolled clove cigarettes and a recently-fired musket. That and his hair reminds me of that stain that poodles get in their fur at their eyes and mouth.

Barbara strikes me as a woman of many strange lotions with the scent signature of a moving van full of old, used retirement home furniture. The imagined smell waxes high when I picture watching Yentil but so far, I haven’t been convicted of shoplifting in Canada, where that is the usual court-ordered punishment. So ffMatt 1, Babs 0.

Together they have hellish synergy enough to scare away sharks on the other side of the globe, a pair of Celebrities… that Probably Smell.


FFSweaty Irishman said...

I couldn't agree with you more FFMatt! As soon as I pulled up the blog I could not get the smell of Patchouli and hot milk out of my house! On a side note, Kris Kristofferson's nipple follows me around the room.

FFJewbacca said...

I had to get a new computer from their scent alone.

FFJewbacca said...

I can't look at Barbra Streisand anymore. Someone post something to knock this down!! SHE IS STARING THROUGH MY SOUL!!!!